Forgiveness
Forgiveness Sermon notes from Pastor Gary Parks message given at Riverside Seventh-day Adventist Christian Church in April 2018.
A Harvard Study of 724 men found that Relationships have the ability to keep us alive longer than our diet and exercise programs. Connecting and Responding to other people’s needs is God Given as we were created in God’s Image. We were born to serve others.
We will come up from the grave with the same character that was developed here.
Forgiveness is not easy.
Our nation has suffered many horrible tragedies when someone with mental illness unloaded a military style assault weapon on innocent bystanders. Here is a short list of these disastrous events.
Las Vegas
San Francisco
Orlando
Fort Lauderdale
San Bernardino
Colorado Springs
Roseburg
Chattanooga
Charleston
Three of the worst were:
Columbine, Colorado
Newtown, Connecticut
Nickel Mines, Pennsylvania
Too many children lost their lives in these tragedies. The shooting in Pennsylvania was in a peaceful Amish village. Charles Carl Roberts IV, a milk truck driver armed with a small arsenal,bursts into a one-room schoolhouse and kills five Amish girls. He kills himself as police storm the building.
Darrell Bigger’s daughter was one of the Amish school girls that were killed by Charles Roberts IV. Because the Amish understand that a lifetime of unforgiveness is more painful than forgiveness, Mr. Bigger chose to forgive Charles Roberts IV.
1 John 1:9
If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
There are now shelters for battered men.
Isaiah 43:25
I, even I, am He who blots out your transgressions for My own sake; And I will not remember your sins.
Hebrews 8:12
For I will be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins and their lawless deeds I will remember no more.
God wants us to have a relationship with us. Jesus is different than every human.
Ephesians 4:32
And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.
In 1997, there were 58 Studies on How Emotions Impact Our Health.
In 2005, there were 1,200 Studies. The most notable was the Stanford University Forgiveness Project. Fred Luskin shares that there is no copyright in the Bible about Forgiveness.
Jesus wants us to be Free. Forgiveness is about remembering things different. Unforgiveness is a disease. There is a connection to the chemicals in the body that impact the immune system. Sixty-one percent of Cancer Patients have forgiveness issues.
There is a correlation between people with anger issues and having a heart disease. Ask people to think about what it would be like to forgive someone.
The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is an attitude of the strong. ~Mahatma Gandhi
Nelson Mandela was imprisoned for 27 years in South Africa. He easily could have left prison with anger about his being imprisoned but practiced Forgiveness and became the First President of South Africa later in his life.
1 John 2:9
He who says he is in the light, and hates his brother, is in darkness until now.
The Bible has instructions about Forgiveness in Matthew 18 verses 21 through 35. God made us to be in Community and laid out the Steps. Jesus says to Forgive 70 times 7 which equals 490 times. We must become a habitual forgiver.
The Parable about the two debtors in verses 24 through 35 reveals a powerful Forgiveness example. One Talent equals about 15 years wages. One debtor owed 10,000 talents. The other debtor had a 100 days wages debt.
How to Forgive
Identify the person who hurt you.
Write out the Incident or Behavior that hurt you.
Write out the Emotions that was caused.
Feel the Pain.
Take a Red Pen and write FORGIVEN over the offense and date it.
Numbers 23:19
God is not a man, that He should lie,
Nor a son of man, that He should repent.
Has He said, and will He not do?
Or has He spoken, and will He not make it good?
Ellen White’s Book “Our High Calling” Page 370.4
There is too much coldness and indifference—too much of the “I don’t care” spirit—exercised among the professed followers of Christ. All should feel a care for one another, jealousy guarding each other’s interests. “Love one another.” Then we should stand a strong wall against Satan’s devices. Amid opposition and persecution we would not join the vindictive ones, not unite with the followers of the great rebel, whose special work is to accuse the brethren, to defame and cast stain upon their characters.
Ellen White’s “Book That I May Know Him” Page 184.5
The door of the mind should be closed against, “they say” or “I have heard.” Why should we not, instead of allowing jealousy or evil surmising to come into our hearts, go to our brethren, and, after frankly but kindly setting before them the things we have heard detrimental to their character and influence, pray with and for them?
Luke 23:34
Then Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do. And they divided His garments and cast lots.
Four Promises of Forgiveness
1. Will Not Think About the Incident
2. Will Not Bring It Up
3. Will Not Talk to Others About It
4. Do Not Let It Stand Between You and People
Nazis in Poland executed a man’s family. He spoke German and was sent to a work camp. He chose forgiveness. Forgiveness is not easy.
“Forgiveness is not an occasional act, it is an attitude”. ~ Martin Luther King
Daniel, well done article. I like a practical plan “How to Forgive” and “Four Promises of Forgiveness”. I did not know how to forgive for the biggest part of my life. I finally learned how to “forget”. It helped me not suffer and not think about painful things that was done to me. But when something reminds me about my enemies, I would experience pain again. So, I tried not to think about it.
Later, I learned that I must “forgive”. It is much different than “forget”. It gives me better quality of feeling. I will not suffer even if I see the person who hurt me because I chose to forgive.
There are several reasons why I am choosing to forgive. First, I understand that if I not forgive, I will suffer physical and emotional pain in my body. It brings down immune system. Second, I learned that unforgivenesses is an obstacle in a prayer. I can’t afford separation with my Heavenly Father. Because of Him, I choose to forgive.
How I implement forgiveness in my life? I give one example.
Several years ago, I was riding my bike. And a man hit me with his car. It was not terrible hit, but I fell on the road. I think, I was going correctly. I had a green light and I assumed that I have a right to go. The man was going from the apartments and was doing a right turn while he had a red light. He did not see me that I was coming on a side-walk from his right side. He only checked his left side; so he will not be hit by car from his left side.
After he hit me with his car, I fell on the road. The man even did not come out from his car to help me to stand up. I wonder if it is a custom in the US or it is something that was about that man. So, I picked up myself. I had a cell phone and could easily call 911. There were witnesses who saw that accident. I could easily make that man life more difficult. But I immediately chose to forgive him.
I just picked up my bike and walked away. My bones were not broken, neither I had terrible scratches. But my body was shaken a lot when I fell. I had pain in different parts of my body for the next 3 days. If I would add to that unforgiveness, I would experience emotional pain, too. It was not easy to forgive the driver. But I promoted the words, “I forgive the driver” trying to convince my brain to forgive the man. I even found excuses for him, like, “He did not want to hit me. He did not see me.” After 3 days or so of these repetitions, my brain finally accepted it. And I totally forgave the driver and I am free. It is not painful to remind this story.
“Forgive” has a better quality than “forget” but needed to be learned and mastered.
Right now, I am choosing to forgive people who hurt me. And I feel much better. But there are people and events in my past that are waiting on my forgiveness. They are still on a “forget” mode. I must go back in my thought to those people and events and work out to forgive them.
Larysa B, Tacoma, WA
Powerful story Larysa, thank you for sharing. I learned about how much damage buried emotional pain can have on our immune system. I chose to Forgive today. I want to be my best for my Savior Jesus Christ.